Blackadder my second favourite quote

Blackadder has so much quotable stuff. My second favourite one just turned up on late night TV.
This on whilst not voiced as its too long as a one liner makes me chuckle when I come across any mad planning

Melchett: You look surprised, Blackadder.

Edmund: I certainly am, sir. I didn't realise we had any battle plans.

Melchett: Well, of course we have! How else do you think the battles are directed?

Edmund: Our battles are directed, sir?

Melchett: Well, of course they are, Blackadder -- directed according to the Grand Plan.

Edmund: Would that be the plan to continue with total slaughter until every- one's dead except Field Marshal Haig, Lady Haig and their tortoise, Alan?

Melchett: Great Scott! (stands) Even you know it! Guard! Guard! Bolt all the doors; hammer large pieces of crooked wood against all the windows! This security leak is far worse than we'd imagined!

All the scripts are here

Now a game of guess my most favourite quote :-)